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I recieved this in my email and thought it was PERFECT !
I like big cars, big cigars and naturally big racks. I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some mid-level governmental functionary with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts squirting out babies. I don't care about appearing compassionate. I think playing with guns doesn't make you a killer. I believe its called the Boy Scouts for a reason. I think I'm better than the homeless. I am not the real Slim Shady, so I think that I’m gonna stay seated right here in this damn comfy chair. I don't think being a minority makes you noble or victimized. I don't care if you call me a racist, a homophobe or a misogynist. I am not tolerant of others because they are different. I know that no matter how big Jennifer Lopez’s toilet gets, I’ll still want to see it.
I don't celebrate Kwanzaa.
I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, you do it in English. I like my porn without silicon. I don't use the excuse "it's for the children" as a shield for unpopular opinions or actions. I want to know when MTV became such crap. I think getting a hummer is sex, and every man is entitled to at least one extremely sloppy one per month. I know what the definition of is is. I think Oprah's eyes are way too far apart. I didn't take the initiative in inventing the Internet. I thought the Taco Bell dog was funny. I want them to bring back safe and sane fireworks.
I believe no one ever died because of something Ozzy Osbourne, Ice-T or Marilyn Manson sang. I think that being a student doesn’t give you any more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster. I’ve never mourned a dead goldfish. I don’t want to eat or drink anything with the words light, lite or fat-free on the package. I believe everyone has a right to pray to their God or gods, while I pray that the test results come back negative. I think the Clippers should play in the WNBA. My heroes are Abraham Lincoln, Orson Wells, Ronald Reagan and whoever canceled Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman. I think creative violence makes movies more interesting and Iraqis more dead.
I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor.
I know wrestling is fake, but I still think The Rock could kick my butt. I think global warming is junk science. I’ve never owned or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years in the desert after getting chased out of Egypt, I haven’t burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you, so shut-the-f-up already. South Park still makes me laugh. I think you can respect and admire women while mentally undressing them. I believe a self-righteous liberal with a cause is more dangerous than a PlayStation. I want to know which church is it exactly where the Rev. Jessie Jackson preaches. I think explosions are cool. I don't care where Ellen puts her tongue. I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you’re running from them. I thought Spinal Tap was great, but Rob Reiner can still kiss my backside.
I worry about dying before I get even.
I’ve discovered that DVD is better than Laserdisc. I like the convenience of buying oranges while I'm waiting at a stop-light, and I'm pretty sure the Latina midget selling them to me is glad she no longer lives in a refrigerator packing carton outside Ensenada. I figured out Bruce Willis was dead midway through The Sixth Sense but enjoyed it anyway. I think turkey bacon sucks. I want somebody to explain to me exactly why it's wrong to point out that when I watch a freeway chase, I know the losers the police eventually pull out of the car are gonna be a gang-banging hommies or vatos. I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes a parent. I think tattoos and piercings are fine if you want them, but please don’t pretend they are a political statement.
I want to know what the hell is going on when Geena Davis has a sitcom.
I like hard women, hard liquor and a hard bowel movement first thing in the morning. I believe you don’t have to speak with a lisp to pick out a couch for your living room. I'll admit that the only movie that ever made me cry was Field of Dreams. I didn't realize Dr. Seuss was a genius until I had a kid. I will not conform or compromise just to keep from hurting somebody's feelings. Sometimes I throw my soft drink can in the trash, even when the recycle bin is just a few more steps. Making love is fine, but sometimes I wanna get laid. I'm neither angry nor disenfranchised, no matter how desperately the mainstream media would like the world to believe otherwise.
Yes, I'm a bad Republican. And I vote... even if it rains.
Flintteach  |
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Wed May 24, 2006 10:13 pm |
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ditto
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Dear Sir
You have posted this before. The dearth of enthusiasm I regret to inform follows you.
Terry Bankert |
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Thu May 25, 2006 3:32 pm |
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I find it so enlightening, I thought I would post it again ! Sorry you didn't enjoy it as much the second time around !
Sincerely,
Flintteach |
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Fri May 26, 2006 9:38 am |
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Adam
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| Careful Teach. We do have problems on our side as well. Although Republican businesses create jobs for Democrats. Republican Businesses can also do shady things like Enron. Our Republican congress has also at times gotten confused and voted like liberal democrats. Did you hear about the Bridge to nowhere? Sorry to put a damper on things but I don't want to get democrats fired up for november. lol I think there will be a lot of Democrats voting for Devos this November. I want to keep it that way. With a Devos loss we can expect to loose even more jobs than we have already. I think we should be near or above depression level already in Flint. We have 30,000 poor people already and I imagine that figure is rising. |
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Fri May 26, 2006 12:53 pm |
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Yes Adam, but those poor in Flint are poor by their own admissions.
Flintteach's creed:
I do not choose to be a common man. It is my right to be uncommon...if I can
I seek opportunity...not security. I do not wish to be a kept citizen, humbled and dulled by having the state look after me. I want to take the calculated risk; to dream and to build, to fail and to succeed.
I refuse to barter incentive for a dole. I prefer the challenges of life to the guaranteed existence; the thrill of fulfillment to the stale calm of utopia.
I will not trade freedom for beneficence nor my dignity for a handout. I will never cower before any master nor bend to any threat. It is my heritage to stand erect, proud and unafraid; to think and act for myself; enjoy the benefits of my creations and to face the world boldly and say, this I have done.
All this is what it means to be an working American ! |
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Fri May 26, 2006 1:29 pm |
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ellwoodflint
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Unfortunately Teach, There are less Americans who feel the way you do than those who do. Do we just throw them all to the streets? We'd all be locked in our homes afraid of who would be outside to take what is ours.
and there are more of them..
Thats why we give to those who won't earn it. If they are pacified, we are safe to go on with our life. Thats the honesty of it all |
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Fri May 26, 2006 5:51 pm |
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Bad Republican
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Conceit wouldn't be so terrible if only the right people had it.
The catfish lays ten thousand eggs
The lonley hen lays one.
The hen will proudly cackle,
To tell us what she has done.
We scorn the humble catfish,
While the lowley hen we prize; Which only goes to show you-
It pays to advertise.
the above are anonymous but seemed fitting.
terrybankert
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Sat May 27, 2006 6:59 am |
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Adam Ford
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I hate to do this with partisan politics but you do need some help here Teach. You need to remember that poor black democrats are crucial to the democratic party. That's the only reason I can figure for some of the tactics used in Flint to help keep people from getting jobs and from businesses moving into Flint. It is illegal for a poor black democrat in Flint to start their own home business. There's this new thing called EBAY in case people haven't heard but Flint discourages garage sales where you can get stuff to buy on Ebay. Instead I guess it's better to take the bus to the Burton Walmart or something. You could also sell a small amount of produce. Anyways to sum it up it is illegal for a poor black democrat in the North End to start a home business in Flint. This was made possible by black democrats on the council, a black democratic clerk and a black democratic mayor. It's also democratic policies that raise the cost of doing business in michigan. Another thing to consider is poor uneducated democrats are not going to get the jobs that the democratic elite get such as the non-profit jobs/social welfare jobs.
To be fair I think the chairman of the Mott Foundation is a Republican. The Mott Foundation is really helping to improve downtown Flint other than it's own run down buildings it owns. With it dragging its feet it is essentially blocking jobs and businesses from coming to Flint. There's also at least one or more democrats on Mott's board though.
Personally I'd rather work in Flint. Let me know if you hear of any jobs in Flint. |
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Sat May 27, 2006 4:33 pm |
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cornholio
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Okay, I thought it was funny.
You guys and your politics need to get over yourselves! Sheesh!
And I'm a democrat. I'll pass on J-Lo's ass.
There are plenty of jobs in Flint. The county just closed a posting for drain laborers (still trying to fill Medical Examiner and Friend of the Court positions, though), and I think the 7-11 at the corner of Corunna and Ballenger is hiring a 3rd shift clerk. Free Slurpees all night ...
It's funny that I can find jobs, since I don't even live in Flint. I may work downtown, but I bring my paycheck home to Tuscola County.  |
_________________
'cause cornholio said so! |
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Mon May 29, 2006 12:15 am |
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